ACT and not be ACTED UPON‏

email dated 2/16/10
Yesterday was Presidents Day, so the library was closed and I couldn't email. Anyway...

The huge snow storm finally hit New Haven this last week. It was pretty awesome. Everything was completely whitewashed, and we were forced to walk in the blizzard all day. It was pretty intense, and I now have more 'classic missionary adversity' stories about tracting in the blizzard, all day, with 50 MPH winds, walking uphill both ways, in the middle of winter, with high humidity. It's a good thing I love the snow so much.

I was reading in 2 Nephi this week, and a familiar passage of scripture in chapter 32 seemed to coincide with many of my thoughts and feelings this week. 2 Nephi 32:7 talks about how Nephi is really discouraged that his people reject the words of the prophets and the Lord, and how they will not obey or understand their words even when it is taught to them with power and clarity. It affirms the conclusion that I've come to that even if the best teacher in the whole world (One might submit that he was Jesus Christ) taught a gospel principle with power, authority, perfect clarity, and with the confirming witness of the spirit, that people would still CHOOSE to not obey or understand-they would elect to be governed by their own lusts rather than God's will (Similarly, this also happened with Jesus Christ). As a teacher of the Gospel myself, it's both sobering and very humbling to know that even though much is required of me through my personal efforts and studies and teaching unto skills, that the end result of whether or not they choose to accept what is being taught is completely independent of my ability to control. I can't exercise someone else's agency for them. Nephi continues in chapter 33 when he says that the spirit carries the message unto their hearts, not into their hearts. They must accept it for themselves. Learning isn't a passive process, whether it be in history class or missionary discussions. We have to learn by faith, which means that we must ACT, we cannot be ACTED UPON. A teacher cannot act upon their student and force them to learn, nor will rote memorization or recalling of information signify that someone is learning. Indeed, we must learn by faith, and we must be active participants in our own education and salvation.

This principle hit me hard this week when my companion and I were expecting 6 investigators to be at church, and 0 showed up. These people had given us solid commitments during the week to make it there, and we had taught them the principle of attending church over and over again with power and clarity, and we had organized rides for several of them who didn't have ways to get there, and they still didn't make it to church. I echo the Lord of the Vineyard in Jacob 5 when he said, "What more could I have done for my [investigators]?" After all I could do, I couldn't force them to learn or to act.

The library is closing early, and I have very little time to write, so I'll have to wrap up.

I love you all, and I'm healthy and doing fine. I appreciate your prayers, and I feel them bolster me up.
-Elder Shepherd