email dated 1/11/10
This week was full of great stuff. I saw a lot of miracles and prayers answered this week.
So I was visiting a woman who has been more or less inactive for the past year. She lost her job and has been selling products for Mary Kay, but she lost her apartment is now living in a 6x7 room in a basement with a mattress on the floor with her 15 year old daughter. She's a single mom, and she literally has nothing. She had a gallon of milk and a carton of eggs, and is living a cramped, cold room with her 15 year old daughter. They have NOTHING. I found myself at a complete loss for words. I didn't know what to say to her-I didn't know what kind of help I could offer her. Then I felt a powerful prompting that I couldn't deny. It was telling me to promise her that if she would come to church every Sunday and pay her tithing that the Lord would improve her circumstances, insomuch that she would have a place to live and food to feed her and her daughter. The temptation to keep my mouth shut was great, but I couldn't quench the spirit. I boldly promised her that if she would come to church and pay her tithing that she would have a place to live and food to feed herself and her daughter. The confirming witness of the spirit was intense as the spirit flooded the room and brought tears to her eyes. I know at least one persons conversion was challenged and strengthened by that experience-it was mine. After that appointment, I thought to myself how bold what I said was, and, in a way, challenged my own faith in the promise I had given her. My faith in the law of tithing and of regular sabbath day observance were both challenged. I was grateful for the times in my life when I had seen the blessings of paying my tithing and attending church, and I was able to recall these past miracles to my mind. Then the spirit confirmed again to me that I did indeed have faith in these things, and that by following the prompting I received and by being bold, my faith was strengthened, and my testimony made firm.
It is in the trial of our faith that we are made strong. It is only when faith is tried do we become firm and steadfast in what we believe. It is only in the trial of our faith can we truly exhibit faith. When your faith is tried, beware the temptation to back down when the pressure mounts. If it was right when you prayed about it and had a testimony of it and lived it, it is still right now. It hasn't changed. Beware the temptation to back down from a good thing, just because it gets hard or you have doubts. It isn't until you take a step into the dark and take a couple hits that your faith becomes strong and is confirmed by the spirit. Give God the time He needs to mold you into the person you need to be. Let it be according to His timetable, and His plans. Don't waste your life asking 'WHY? why me? why this? why now?' - rather, ask Him 'WHAT do you want me to do? HOW do you want me to do it?'. I am convinced that as we approach life's difficulties with a 'what' and 'how' attitude rather than a 'why' mentality, we will see our dreams fulfilled, our goals achieved, and our grand potential more fully realized.
Just do what it is right, and stop fighting the Lord and His path. He knows whats best for you better than you do.I love you all so much. I am learning and growing so much through my trials and experiences. I thank God for my many blessings and for the wonderful life He has blessed me with. It's certainly not because I deserve it, or merit such love and blessings, but because I am His son, and He loves me in a way that I can't possibly understand.
Take care! Don't forget what your knees are really for...
-Elder Shepherd
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